open + overflow post

[shipping]

OPEN POST

AZIRAPHALE

BUCK

ERIK

HUA CHENG

STEVE

WANGJI

Comments

bruh i actually googled all these

[pursuitofcappiness]

Sure. The old town's nice, it's by a lake. By the time we get out of Ross's meeting, the zoo might be closed, but depending on your lab thing we might still be able to check out the Kunsthaus, and then get fondue after. It's only a seven minute walk to the raclette factory, which is right by the water.

If you'd rather go to the botanical garden, there's a Fribourg fondue parlor a 9-minute walk away. But I don't think we'll have time to go to both the museum and the garden.

dis is y ur hawt ♫

[ironism]

We'll just play it by ear. But hey, serious talk, if you ever decide to lay down your shield and quit the Avengers gig, I'll have Pepper hire you into our travel management department. You'd be perfect for it.

singlehandedly keeping mims career alive

[pursuitofcappiness]

Think I'll pass, but thanks.

Guess I'll see you at the jet tomorrow morning, unless you're coming back here tonight.

[ironism]

If we're going to DC together, I might as well head back to the Compound for the night. I hear Clint's planning a barbecue. Is that still on?

[pursuitofcappiness]

Just texted him and he says yes. I'm also checking the fridge now, you mind picking some stuff up on your way back? I can do it too, just let me know.

[ironism]

You realize I haven't been to the grocery store like... ever? I guess you wouldn't know that. But text me the list. I'll get Happy on it. He's bored to death waiting on me anyways.

[pursuitofcappiness]

Never in your life?

Okay, never mind. I'll make a trip.

But you can send Happy to pick up napkins if he's bored. And drinks. Unless you're taking care of that. Does Happy stock your bars, too?

[ironism]

No idea who stocks anything around anywhere. That's not my area of expertise. I got a lot on my plate if you hadn't realized. But I'm happy to fund any expenses. That includes your trip to DC, tonight's barbecue, and basically everyone's entire livelihood. Getting napkins though? You've got me flummoxed. Aren't those always just available anywhere? Sort of like the air we breathe? No?

[pursuitofcappiness]

Tony, no. Only in your world. Here's a list for Happy:

[ Attachment ]

I'll see you later tonight. Are you going to pay attention to your meeting or are you going to start sending me me-mes?

[ironism]

What the hell are me-mes? Are you thinking I don't pay attention to you while you're going on and on and on during team meetings? Is that it?

[pursuitofcappiness]

You know, me-mes.



And no, I'd notice if you weren't paying attention in my meetings.

[ironism]

God, that's awful. It's just memes, Cap. No need to get fancy with it.

Also, it's easier to pay attention to you. You're pretty.

[pursuitofcappiness]

This is why the Internet thinks we're together.

But I'd be lying if I said I didn't put on my nice pants when I think the presentation's going to bore you.

[ironism]

Is that why you showed up in that sexy pair of blue jeans last week? Guess I do spend a ridiculous amount of time staring at your ass. It's completely work related. I do it for research, re: uniform update. It's not like I'm imagining what it would be like to bend you over a desk. TMI?

[pursuitofcappiness]

Definitely TMI, and you really need to stop making passes at me just because you're bored.

But I walked into that one. Yes, when I think you're dozing off or about to text Rhodey or something, I try to have something to jot down on the whiteboard. Gets you listening every time.

[ironism]

Listening? Or just plain fantasizing? The latter seems more probable, right?

You saying I'm allowed to make passes at you when I'm not bored, Rogers? We making up rules now?

[pursuitofcappiness]

I just need to know when I agreed to fondue, did the meaning change at all in the last seventy years? It's still just cheese and bread?

[ironism]

Why are you asking me this? ( he totally knows why. he just likes messing with the guy. )

[pursuitofcappiness]

Just wanted to know if I accidentally agreed to something.

But to be very clear, I don't want a fling.

[ironism]

Why not? Rumor has it you haven't had sex in 70 years. Is it because I'm a man? You don't find me sexually attractive?

( is he snickering on the other end? he's definitely going to special hell for this. of all the things to be texting captain america about. )

[pursuitofcappiness]

Well I've never thought about you like that, but no, that isn't it. Call me old-fashioned, but I'm only looking for something serious.

[ironism]

Good for you. Commitment. Love it. Makes the world go around. But seriously, you've never thought about me like that? Really?

Look, on a scale of 1-10, I'm gonna need you to rate how attractive you think I am. Let's go. Come on. Give me your honest opinion.

[pursuitofcappiness]

No, and I don't think about any of our teammates like that, either.

Aren't you one of People's sexiest men alive? So objectively, you're a 10.

What am I, like an 8? 9 if I don't talk too much?

[ironism]

Definitely a 9 when you're not nagging at me. A 10 if I'm looking at you from behind. You're hot. I'd fuck you. Is that weird to say?

[pursuitofcappiness]

No, I got that.

It's not weird. I just think we want different things.

I tried having meaningless sex. Felt like I might as well at the time, I might not get another chance. I don't regret it, but I'm not proud of it.

And you mean a lot to me, but the sex wouldn't.